June 5, 1893

On June 5, 1893, the trial of Lizzie Borden for the axe murders of her father, Andrew Borden, and step-mother, Abby Borden, began in New Bedford, Massachusetts. If this murder was to occur today, it would have captivated the media for months. It had everything. A young, sexy, rich woman who was suspected of hacking her gold-digging stepmother to death and then taking the same axe to her father, who was suspected of molesting her and her older sister. She was subsequently found not guilty, although everyone knows she did it. She was OJ before OJ was OJ.

Lizzie Borden took an axe
And gave her mother eighteen whacks.
When she saw what she had done,
She gave her father ten and one.

Andrew Borden now is dead,
Lizzie hit him on the head.
Down in Hell, he will disagree,
Because Lizzie got away, don’t you see.

About Joel Byers

Born in North Georgia and educated at some very fine public institutions. Real education started after graduating from college and then getting married and raising two boys. Has the ability to see the funny and absurd in most things and will always remark on it, even if it means getting the stink-eye from his victims.
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