June 29, 1914

On June 29, 1914, Jina Guseva attempted to assassinate the most evil man in Russia. That’s right, she stabbed and tried to kill Grigori Rasputin in his home town of Pokrovskove, Siberia. Rasputin was visiting his wife and homunculi, excuse me, his children, and decided to walk off his dinner. Jina Guseva rushed up to him and stabbed him in the gut with a knife and screamed, “I have killed the Anti-Christ!”. Rasputin was able to fight her off and run away, but she gave pursuit stabbing at him with her knife. The townsfolk were able pull Guseva away from Rasputin and protect him. Thwarted, Guseva turned herself in to the authorities. Rasputin survived his gut-wound and returned to the capitol. The peasant woman Jina Guseva was eventually tried for the attempted murder of Rasputin, but was found not guilty on reason of being insane and placed in an asylum. She was released in 1917, about a year after Rasputin was finally banished back to Hell. One interesting note about Guseva. She didn’t have a nose. It was missing the entire time. She also claims that she never had syphilis and never explained how her nose went missing. It was 1914 and it was well-known in Russia that Baba Yaga demanded weird payments for the help in killing demons, devils and the assorted Anti-Christ.

About Joel Byers

Born in North Georgia and educated at some very fine public institutions. Real education started after graduating from college and then getting married and raising two boys. Has the ability to see the funny and absurd in most things and will always remark on it, even if it means getting the stink-eye from his victims.
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