Tag Archives: America

May 10, 1933

On May 10, 1933, the ruling Nazi Party staged massive book burnings all throughout Germany. What kind of books did they burn? The books of traitors, emigrants and authors from foreign countries who the Germans thought were attacking the New Germany. H.G. Wells was particularly hated. The literature of Marxism, Communism, Bolshevism, and Socialism. Pacifist … Continue reading

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March 2, 1917

On March 2, 1917, the citizens of the American Territory of Puerto Rico were granted US citizenship with the enactment of the Jones Act. This means for the last 100 years, Puerto Ricans have been American citizens with all the rights and duties and privileges of an American citizen. They can even vote for the … Continue reading

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February 10, 2009

On February 10, 2009, two communication satellites collided over Siberia. The American Iridium 33 was in its assigned lane driving the speed limit, when the derelict Russian Kosmos-2251 came barreling over the horizon. It tried to pass on the right when it clipped the American satellite, causing both to crash and burn. It is believed … Continue reading

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November 29, 1961

On November 29, 1961, Enos, an American chimpanzee was launched into space by NASA. He was the third hominid and first chimpanzee to achieve Earth orbit. The first two hominids were Soviet astronauts Yuri Gagarin and Gherman Titov. The Americans said Enos proved to be a better astronaut since he wouldn’t sneak vodka on board … Continue reading

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September 15, 1775

On September 15, 1775, an early and unofficial American flag was raised by Lieutenant Colonel Isaac Mott after capturing Fort Johnson from the British. The flag was dark blue with the white words “Send Nudez” spelled on it. This was quickly brought down and replaced with one that had “Liberty” spelled on it. Little known, … Continue reading

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August 26, 1952

On August 26, 1952, the city of San Francisco began fluoridating their water. Senator Joseph McCarthy railed against it, as he said it was a Communist Plot to turn Americans into cross-dressing homosexuals. J. Edgar Hoover, the Head of the FBI, promised McCarthy that he would personally go to San Francisco and investigate.

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August 20, 1923

On August 20, 1923, the “Shenandoah”, the first American dirigible was launched. It went airborne at its mooring in Lakehurst, NJ. The “Shenandoah” was cautioned about flying over Washington, DC when the Senate was is session as the large and copious amounts of hot air could force the airship high up in the atmosphere and … Continue reading

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August 18, 1587

On August 18, 1587, Virginia Dare became the first child born on American soil of English parents, thereby becoming the first anchor baby in American history.

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August 2, 1791

On August 2, 1791, Americans Samuel Briggs and his son, Samuel Briggs, Jr., received a joint patent for their nail-making machine. They were the first father-son pair to receive an American patent. They really nailed it for the father-son contribution in 1791, didn’t they? Naaaaiiiiilllllled it. Naaaaiiiillllleeeeeddddd it. I’m going to keep hammering this pun … Continue reading

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April 28, 1896

On April 28, 1896, the Addressograph was patented by J.S. Duncan. What is the Addressograph you ask? It was a machine that would print addresses on letters, thereby speeding up the process of mass mailings. Thank you J.S. Duncan, because of you, the first step in sending multitudes of people junk mail, scam letters, and … Continue reading

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