November 19, 1620

On This Date in TWISTED-HISTORY! in 1620, the Pilgrims sighted Cape Cod and dropped to their knees in prayer and thanksgiving, as the voyage had been long and physically sickening, with much discomfort with sea sickness and the poor selection of food at the buffet tables. The Mayflower’s crew also dropped to their knees in prayer and thanksgiving as they were going to finally be able to get that bunch of whining, intolerant, petty puritans off their ship, and they could finally go back to drinking their daily beer ration. They were also looking forward to there being some bacon at the breakfast buffet, as the puritans had not been leaving any for the crew.

About Joel Byers

Born in North Georgia and educated at some very fine public institutions. Real education started after graduating from college and then getting married and raising two boys. Has the ability to see the funny and absurd in most things and will always remark on it, even if it means getting the stink-eye from his victims.
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