On This Date in TWISTED-HISTORY.com! in 1497 in the Italian city of Florence, the supporters of the Dominican priest Girolamo Savonarola collected (sometimes without the owners’ consent, okay, many times without the owners’ consent) and publicly burned thousands of objects that might tempt a person to sin, such as, paintings, sculptures, cosmetics, books (especially the really naughty ones), musical instruments, expensive dresses, mirrors and even playing cards. It seems that whenever a horny priest can’t keep his thoughts to himself, he has to try and burn other people’s stuff.
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This a terribly unfair stereotype!
First off, your assumption that horny priests can’t keep their thoughts to themselves is absolutely untrue. I’m a horny priest and I don’t share my perverted thoughts with anyone. Nobody knows about my furry nun fetish. NOBODY. And has anyone ever heard me say one word about my armpit fixation? NO. Because I don’t talk about it.
Secondly, we don’t all run around trying to burn other people’s stuff. Sometimes we burn our own stuff. Sometimes we burn our fingers trying to burn stuff. And of course you can’t underestimate the effectiveness of scathing comments and sarcasm. I mean sure, fire is sexy. We all love fire, right? I mean who hasn’t fantasized about making sweet sweet love to a raging inferno. But that doesn’t mean that’s all we think about. A nun in a squirrel costume (or a squirrel in a nun costume) will turn my head every time. Fire can’t hold a candle, so to speak, to that. Not to mention the allure of a well-turned armpit. I mean, hubba hubba. Am I right?
But I get side-tracked. My point is that your article is misleading in SO many ways, as I have hopefully outlined clearly above. In future, please try to refrain from painting us all in such broad strokes. We’re not all like the unfortunate fellow that you described in your post.
You really should be careful about such things anyway. Your web site looks awfully flammable to me. I’m mean, I’m not suggesting… I’m just saying. One stray spark and whoosh!
Yours most sincerely,
Father Ignis Fuoco