October 14, 1862

On October 14, 1862, Brooklyn baseball player James Creighton did something that has not been repeated since. While playing against the Morrisania team he swung viciously at a pitch and hit a homerun. Because of how hard he swung, he ruptured his abdominal wall and gave himself a hernia. He died four days later from internal bleeding. No other player has hit a homerun and died as a result of it.

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October 13, 1967

On October 13, 1967, the brand, spanking new American Basketball Association played its first game in direct competition with the old, stodgy National Basketball League. Afros and goatees were allowed, even for the white players. To be fair, there were several white players who should have stayed clean shaven. Although Dan Issel would have benefited from growing as much facial hair as possible to hide all that ugly.

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October 12, 1853

On October 12, 1853, Boxer John Morrisey won the world heavyweight title under unusual circumstances. After the 36th round, his foe, Yankee Sullivan voluntarily left the ring, thereby forfeiting the match. Why did he leave the ring? To go and punch some of Morrisey’s rather vocal fans. He got so mad at Morrisey’s supporters, he had to go and hit them during the fight.

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October 11, 1983

On October 11, 1983, technology caught up with Bryant Pond, Maine. On this date, the last of the hand-cranked telephones in the United States went out of service. The 440 telephone customers of Bryant Pond were switched to direct-dial. To put in perspective how horse-and-buggy Bryant Pond was, the first 1G cellphone system was started in America on March 6, 1983. So, in 1983, there were people in America still using a hand-cranked telephone while other Americans were carrying their telephones with them.

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October 10, 1969

On October 10, 1969, the “Jesus Christ Superstar” soundtrack album was recorded by Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice. “Jesus Christ Superstar” was a rock opera that was released in 1970 and debuted on Broadway in 1971. This album and musical act sent the conservative Christians into a frothing, spit-spewing, hate-filled tirade against Satanist, Communists, and Liberals. They even said that God was going to punish America for allowing this unpatriotic filth to be produced. Teenagers in 1970 and 1971 listened to the album anyway. They said the music was catchy and cool.

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October 9, 1989

On October 9, 1989, Tass, the official Soviet news agency reported that a shiny, globe-like UFO had been spotted at the city of Voronzh, in southwestern Russia. The report included that a trio of tall aliens with small heads had visited the city of Voronzh. They were dressed in silvery overalls and bronze boots and had a pet robot that they travelled with. The aliens became very disappointed when they were informed that the night-life was not on par with Area 51 and left in an angry tiff.

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October 8, 1964

On October 8, 1964, Ringo Starr passed his English driving test at the age of 24. He said it became extremely easy once he realized you needed to be completely sober and drug free before you take the test.

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October 7, 2003

On October 7, 2003, actor Randy Quaid received a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. He immediately covered it with aluminum foil to keep the Illuminati from tracking his whereabouts through the transmitters imbedded in the fillings in his teeth.

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October 6, 1880

On October 6, 1880, the National League booted out the Cincinnati Reds for selling beer during their game. It was a different era. Contrast this to June 4, 1974 when the Texas Rangers played the Cleveland Indians on 10 cent beer night. Mayhem happened. Fires were set. Fights broke out. The game was stopped and Cleveland had to forfeit it to Texas. I guess selling beer at $5 a glass limits just how drunk a single baseball fan can get.

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October 5, 1974

On October 5, 1974, American David Kunst completed the first independently verified walk around the world on foot. The journey included trekking across four continents (North America, Europe, Asia and Australia) and consisted of 14,450 miles. He wore through 21 pairs of shoes, had his brother killed by bandits in Afghanistan and found his future wife in Australia. This was an amazing and heartbreaking journey and Mr. Kunst should be remembered for his achievement.

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