May 23, 1785

On May 23, 1785, US Founding Father and inventor Benjamin Franklin announced that he had invented bifocals, which were glasses that would allow a person to see both far away and up close. He also announced that for $18.99, he would sell to discerning customers an upgrade that would allow a person to see a woman in her chemise (17th and 18th century underwear). When asked how that was possible, Mr. Franklin would hold out his hand and wait. Once the $18.99 was paid, he would take the customer aside and tell them. “First, you put the bifocals on, then you go up to the lady that you are interested in seeing naked or nearly naked, and say to her, ‘Did you know that I’m Benjamin Franklin, and I discovered electricity.’ The next thing you know, you’re in her bedroom and her clothes are off.” His customers would invariably say, “That’s not going to work for me, I’m not Benjamin Franklin!” and he’d always respond, “But it works for me every time?”

 

About Joel Byers

Born in North Georgia and educated at some very fine public institutions. Real education started after graduating from college and then getting married and raising two boys. Has the ability to see the funny and absurd in most things and will always remark on it, even if it means getting the stink-eye from his victims.
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