March 30, 1533

On This Date in! in 1533 Henry VIII divorced his first wife, Catherine of Aragon. Apparently he’d got a whiff of the new wife smell as he’d done a little window shopping at the local New Wife Dealership in London and decided that since he had a little extra money in the Royal Treasury, he’d go ahead and trade in. He fell in love with a 1509 Anne Boleyn that was fresh off the boat from France and chose one that was olive toned and sporty with perky headlights. Henry did have some regrets giving up his 1485 Catherine of Aragon, as she had been his first and she had lasted 26 years, but she had been a used wife when he got her, and he really wanted to see what all the fuss was about owning a sports wife that was faster to accelerate and could really handle the turns.

About Joel Byers

Born in North Georgia and educated at some very fine public institutions. Real education started after graduating from college and then getting married and raising two boys. Has the ability to see the funny and absurd in most things and will always remark on it, even if it means getting the stink-eye from his victims.
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