January 12, 1998

On January 12, 1998, nineteen nations decided to ban the cloning of humans. The Council of Europe issued an amendment to its ‘Convention on Human Rights and Biomedicine”, where it and its member nations prohibit any intervention seeking to create a human being identical to another human being, whether living or dead. Russia, not being a member of the Council of Europe did not at first ban human cloning, and did accept scientific research and equipment from the Cult of Dolly, Midlothian, Scotland during 1999. Dolly 1a instructed her Scot handmaidens and handladdies to share with the Russians their cloning secrets. According to secrets files hidden within the Illuminati, the Chernobyl disaster did not destroy all of the genetic material of Hitler the Soviets had stored away, and they were willing to try Dolly’s cloning technique, instead of growing a new Hitler brain and storing it in a killer robot powered by nuclear fission. Which proved to be a HORRIBLE mistake on April 25, 1986. Even with the new and tested technology, The Russians have been unable to regrow a Hitler human, as they all came out to be sheep. Sheep with Hitler mustaches, while amusing, were not the result the Russians were hoping to accomplish. Since sheep don’t have opposable thumbs and are incapable of piloting tanks or planes.

About Joel Byers

Born in North Georgia and educated at some very fine public institutions. Real education started after graduating from college and then getting married and raising two boys. Has the ability to see the funny and absurd in most things and will always remark on it, even if it means getting the stink-eye from his victims.
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One Response to January 12, 1998

  1. A Time Traveller from 2211 says:

    The Woolly Rebellion was no laughing matter, my friend.

    You lot were always so worried about a robot uprising that you overlooked the real threat to humanity, until it was too late.

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