December 14, 2014

On December 14, 2014, a lonely scientist at the McMurdo Station in Antarctica decided to try his luck on the dating app “Tinder”. To his amazement, he found a hit just 45 minutes away by helicopter. It was another lonely researcher in the Dry Valleys region. He swiped right and “SO DID SHE!” It is rumored that the message he sent was “So, what part of the Great Ice Wall are you guarding?” and her romantic response was, “The part bordering against the cave that houses the last of the shoggoths.” The lonely, horny scientist asked that his name be omitted because the telekinetic Emperor Penguins become very upset when people abuse their Wifi privileges.

But wait... If the Great Ice Wall exists (which it doesn't), then the Earth would have to be flat (which it isn't), which would mean that Dry Valleys would be more than 45 minutes away from McMurdo Station by helicopter (which it's not). Sorry, I was using logic again. Share Twisted-History. And please don't report me to the Telekinetic Emperor Penguins.

About Joel Byers

Born in North Georgia and educated at some very fine public institutions. Real education started after graduating from college and then getting married and raising two boys. Has the ability to see the funny and absurd in most things and will always remark on it, even if it means getting the stink-eye from his victims.
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