Tag Archives: California

February 7, 2011

On February 7, 2011, Jose Luis Ochoa, age 35 of California was maliciously killed by an angry dinosaur. That’s right, a fighting gamecock killed him. Mr. Ochoa, while attending an illegal cockfight was slashed in the calf by one of the blades attached… Continue reading

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June 16, 1896

On June 16, 1896, the temperature hit a scorching 127°F at Fort Mojave, California. Samuel M. McCowan, Superintendent of the Fort Mojave Indian School said if one more teacher or student said, “It’s not the heat, it’s the… Continue reading

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December 18, 1996

On December 18, 1996, the Oakland, California school board passed a resolution that officially declared “Ebonics” a language or dialect. The speakers and proponents of Esperanto scoffed and said, “Give it a year or two and see if it lasts.” It didn’t. Redneck-a-bonics and Whitetrashabonics didn’t gain much traction either. Git-er-done and Cash Me Outside … Continue reading

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November 3, 1998

On November 3, 1998, the state of Minnesota elected former pro wrestler Jesse “The Body” Ventura as its governor. He promptly showed how crazy he was. In 2003 the state of California said “whatever you can do I can do better” and elected actor Arnold Schwarzenegger as governor. He did not go on an immediate … Continue reading

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October 20, 1967

On October 20, 1967, Peeping Toms, Roger Patterson and Robert Gimlim, took a felonious video of a very hairy, and very ugly, Sasquatchian Bigfootacus at Bluff Creek in Northern California without its permission. The cryptid that was videoed, who to this day wishes to remain anonymous, has stated many times that it has felt violated. … Continue reading

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October 2, 1967

On October 2, 1967, all six members of the Grateful Dead were arrested for possession of marijuana in San Francisco, California. The police entered without a warrant, because they knew that the band members of the Grateful Dead lived there, and they even broke the door down, because they knew there was going to be … Continue reading

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September 20, 1995

On September 20, 1995, the US House of Representatives voted to do away with the national speed limit and allow the States to set their own. States like Wyoming, Montana and California were ecstatic, since on many of their highways a majority of drivers ignored the 55 mph maximum anyway. Hill Valley, California did establish … Continue reading

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August 17, 1995

On August 17, 1995, a first occurred. Security guards removed Courtney Love from the stage after she began fighting with her fans because they weren’t cheering loud enough to suit her during the last night of the Lollapalooza tour in Mountain View, CA. Normally it’s the fans who get removed for being drunk and belligerent.

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August 15, 1960

On August 15, 1960, it was reported that a UFO was sighted by two California highway patrolmen searching for a speeding motorcyclist. Patrolmen Stanley Scott and Charles Carson claimed that it was a large red glowing football shaped object. It was spotted suspiciously hovering over a field. They were able to chase it as it … Continue reading

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July 10, 1913

On July 10, 1913, the temperature in Death Valley, California hit 134 °F, the highest temperature ever recorded on Earth. The Devil and his entourage immediately bought time-shares and now spend their Christmas break there every year.

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