December 8, 1854

On This Date in TWISTED-HISTORY.com! in 1854, Pope Pius IX proclaimed the dogma of the Immaculate Conception. This theory holds that Mary, mother of Jesus, was free of original sin from the moment she was conceived. It was later learned from her diary, “The Life and Times of a Good Girl Born to be Better”, that she had to make-do with the hand-me-down sins of her older sisters, Greta and Lisa, and would occasionally commit the sin of leaving food on her plate and not thinking of all the starving children in Caledonia. Mary did live a virtuous life during her teenage years and wore ear-covers to prevent unwanted pregnancies from any sweet-talking deity that might happen to notice her as it flew overhead in the form of an eagle, golden shower, rainbow, or winged unicorn.

About Joel Byers

Born in North Georgia and educated at some very fine public institutions. Real education started after graduating from college and then getting married and raising two boys. Has the ability to see the funny and absurd in most things and will always remark on it, even if it means getting the stink-eye from his victims.
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