On December 21, 1970, Elvis Presley, the younger, better looking and more talented ootheca-sibling of Ripsorck Epsilom 14 of Gliese 832 met with fellow ootheca-sibling and US President Richard Nixon in the White House. Elvis was there to remind Richie not to do anything stupid like their older sibling, Ripsorck. It had taken a lot of Earth money and a couple of assassinations to put Nixon in the US Presidency, so he was warned not to screw it up as it was going to take until at least 1975 before the Gliesean Space Armada could arrive and steal Earth’s oceans. It turns out that Ripsorck wasn’t the biggest loser in that family, as Tricky Dick started illegally wire-tapping the Democrats in 1972, got caught in 1973 and resigned in 1974 as President. What’s really odd was how good an imitation of Mark Felt, Sr., that Ripsorck was able to do, even years later.
Of the three siblings, Presley got most of the musical talent. Poor Ripsorck can't carry a tune in a bucket (although Nixon was a surprisingly passable tenor). Share this post to wisely avoid "Ripsorck Sings Elvis' Greatest Hits".