February 11, 2006

On This Date in TWISTED-HISTORY.com! in 2006, while Vice President Dick Cheney was quail hunting in Texas he accidentally shot his acquaintance, attorney Harry Whittington, in the face, neck, and torso, after mistaking him for a quail. Mr. Whittington subsequently apologized to the Vice President and said it was his fault, as everyone in Texas knows, that a shooter has the right of way. Trey Parker of South Park fame said that in his opinion that Cheney was cleared of any blame for the shooting, since he was heard to shout before opening fire, “Watch out! He’s coming right for me!” There was some question about whether Mr. Cheney and his friends were drinking while they hunted and whether that attributed to his incidental shooting of an attorney out of season, but the people (those god-damned liberals) were reminded that the quail ranch Cheney’s party was hunting on had a two drink minimum and that Texas did not have any HWUI (hunting while under intoxication) laws.

About Joel Byers

Born in North Georgia and educated at some very fine public institutions. Real education started after graduating from college and then getting married and raising two boys. Has the ability to see the funny and absurd in most things and will always remark on it, even if it means getting the stink-eye from his victims.
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